I know.  Guys are regarded as more commitment-phobic than women but trust me, “Guys Rushing In” is a thing.

Men are often reticent to commit to marriage or long-term relationships but when it comes to “being an item”, men usually move quicker than women.

Why?

Often, it’s because of sex.

Men tend to use sex as a way of gauging their interest – to determine if the sexual chemistry is there.

Conversely, women tend to wait on sex.  Trust and safety need to be established before they are comfortable doing it.

While men are often viewed as “wanting to get into a woman’s pants”, that doesn’t tell the whole story.  Men, just like women, want to decide if this person is right for them.

How men get there is different.

Physical appearance, sexual chemistry – why do men place so much emphasis here?

Are we just shallow?

No.

It’s an evolutionary thing – it’s in our DNA to want to claim a mate, shield her from other men and have offspring.

But evolutionary psychology doesn’t fully explain the “rushing in” phenomenon.

There’s something else.

Guys rush in because of the feelings their feeling.

We want them to continue.

Finding someone we like, and who likes us back, creates an enormous pull.

Powerful hormones like endorphins and dopamine flood our brain and we don’t want them to stop.

There’s only one problem – they don’t last.

The euphoria fades and that’s when the real relationship begins.

While it might be tempting to rush in early, keep this in mind –

You don’t know her yet.

And it’s better to be patient, spend more time together and make a clearer decision once all the hormones level off.

Men DO have a tendency to rush in.  Some of it is innate.  Some of it is our brains doing what they do – chasing after those good feelings.

The key here is to step back, get some perspective and use your brain differently – use it to evaluate whether you want to be with this person.

Do that and you’ll spend less time correcting impulsive relationship choices and more time with women you actually want to be with.

Leave a Comment

0