We all want to believe we possess the skills to thrive in social situations but that’s just not the case.

Whether we had poor role models or a lack of self-esteem, many of us never developed these skills.

Say hello to Emotional Intelligence. 

This has become a common phrase and most people have at least a vague idea of what it means.

Do you?

Emotional Intelligence is your ability to acknowledge your own emotions, recognize them in others and use both to drive your behavior.

There is a direct correlation between your emotional intelligence and your success – at anything.

Do you know what happens when you’re not emotionally intelligent?

You’re a mess.

Women lose interest in you.

People don’t want to deal with you.

You get angry and don’t know why.

The list goes on and on. 

In the context of meeting and holding on to women, you have to be emotionally intelligent to be successful.  If you’re not, women won’t be drawn to you.

And they won’t keep you around.

So let’s break it down.

Here are the components that form the foundation of EI:

  1. Self-awareness: ability to identify your emotions (recognizing your discomfort when in a crowded setting)
  2. Self-regulation: ability to manage your emotions (knowing how to calm yourself when anxious)
  3. Motivation: ability to motivate yourself internally without relying on external factors like money or other people’s opinions
  4. Empathy: being aware of the emotions of others (can you tell if someone is comfortable with you vs. anxious?)
  5. Socialization: your ability to get where you want to be with other people (conveying ideas, dealing with conflict, etc.)

Which of these are a strength?

Which ones need development?

Knowing yourself, being able to read others and using both to get what you want are critical in relationships.

How do you think your skills stack up?

Here’s a quick way to find out:

Take a look at the results you’re getting. 

Not quite what you want?

Time to bone up on your EI skills!

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