If you’ve been following my blogs the past few years, I wrote one on the goodnight kiss which is  a tricky thing, especially if you try it after your first date.

The awkwardness of it is the culmination of that moment of truth – saying goodbye.

No moment is more revealing.

Everything that goes on during the date could be a smokescreen.

Even if you’re adept at reading body language, it’s still difficult to get a read on her during the date. 

It’s only when you’re saying goodbye, can you get an idea of whether she likes you.

If I’m interested in someone, I’ll usually say something like “I’d like to see you again” and then get specific – “wanna do something next week?” 

Then I watch for her reaction.  If she says “sure” without much enthusiasm, I know there’s not a lot of conviction there but it’s wait and see.  She may be on the fence.

If she doesn’t commit – “let me check and get back to you” – she’s not interested.  How do I know?  Because I didn’t give her a date.  What is she checking?

If she says she has plans, without giving details, she’s probably lying and there’s a slim chance I’ll be seeing her again.

Saying goodbye after the first date is the moment of truth.

Her reaction in those few seconds will tell you more about how she feels than all of her words from the prior few hours. 

Pay attention.  Watch her body language.  Listen to her voice tone.  Is she making eye contact?  Is she moving away from you?

All these things will tell you how she really feels. 

And here’s two specific things to look out for:

  • Does she proactively hug you before you can do or say anything?  That’s the friend hug.  If she gives you one, she’s not interested. 
  • What does your gut tell you?  Instinctively we know if the goodbye went well or not.  If you come away with an uneasy feeling, chances are you picked up on some negative non-verbal cues.

Pay attention when saying goodnight on a first date. 

She may not realize it, but she’s giving you plenty of information to determine whether there will be a date #2.

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